Ted Lasso Quote
Ted: Hey, guys.
Siobhan: Hey, Coach.
Niamh: Hey, Coach.
Ted: Y'all have a good Sunday?
Both: No.
Ted: Oh, why? What happened?
Siobhan: Yesterday there was an incident at our family's... pig farm.
Niamh: Pig farm. All the pigs are really smart, but there is this one that is an... idiot, Oo Goobley.
Siobhan: Idiot. Oo Goobley.
Ted: I'm sorry?
Niamh: That's his name.
Siobhan: He's always awake when all the other pigs are asleep.
Niamh: He has insomnia.
Siobhan: He has insomnia.
Niamh: So when we woke up and we didn't see him, we thought he'd run away.
Siobhan: And he's so dumb. Of course he ran away. So then we go to...
Niamh: Neighbor's house. Morag.
Siobhan: Morag.
Niamh: She used to be our babysitter. She's got purple hair.
Siobhan: Listens to Norwegian death metal.
Niamh: Because the thing is this pig loves music.
Siobhan: Loves music. So we go to Morag's and we're yelling like, "Oo Goobley! Oo Goobley!"
Niamh: "Oo Goobley! Oo Goobley!"
Siobhan: But he's not there. So then we go back to...
Niamh: Follow his hoofprints, and they lead us to a well, and then we're thinking...
Siobhan: "Oh, no. He's in the well."
Niamh: "He's in the well."
Siobhan: But there's no way he'd be able to fit.
Niamh: He's our fattest pig.
Siobhan: But he's completely gone. So then we're like...
Niamh: (gasps) "He's been pig-napped!"
Siobhan: (gasps) "He's been pig-napped!"
Niamh: So then we go to the market to get some sweets to make ourselves feel better, and who do we see?
Siobhan: Oo Goobley eating from a cheese wheel. It was Parmesan. His favorite.
Niamh: His favorite. So then we come back from the market with a pig and an entire cheese wheel because we had to buy the whole thing.
Siobhan: The whole thing. It was three kilograms. It cost 150 quid.
(both sigh)
Ted: Did all that really happen?
Niamh: Of course it did.
Siobhan: Yeah. Unless we had the same dream.
Niamh: 'Cause that has happened before.
Siobhan: 'Cause that has happened before.
Ted: Mm-hmm. Well, hey, I'm happy y'all found Oogly Boogly.
Niamh: Oo Goobley. First name Oo.
Siobhan: Last name Goobley.
Quote from S04E09 - Mae Rides the Bus